Awesome! I was actually thinking about making a post like this for a while.
Right off the bat, the comic cover looks very anime like, or like a movie cover. I'm guessing that dark ominous character in the top center will be the main focus and his spooky aura makes me want to learn about him more.
Because Tapastic's window for showing full paged comics is a little weird I do not see the dialogue at the bottom of the panel on your 1st page and got lost in the placement of words, reading the top words then moving the right until I realized i missed some text that was at the very bottom of the first panel. Though if the book was to be published, then you have no problems.
I found the monologue at the beginning very intriguing. tho at the end "An Ideal... A desire, --- The absolute", I was rather expecting a smoother flow, like "An Absolute". 3s are ideal when it comes to repetitive things and so 3 words with the same beginning would give it that smooth flow.
Dialogue in the first few pages is confusing as you don't have a little tip on the bubble pointing to the speaker but you fix this right up in the following pages (good catch ). I love how you use so many different perspectives, makes the dialogue fresh while giving something for the viewer to be distracted by while the voice is playing out in their head. Sometimes dialogue comes off a little long. As an impatient reader i found myself trying to rush through some bubbles of dialogue. Usually what one can do is break up the dialogue into smaller chunks, but that would require more drawing, so it's your choice.
I don't know what I think about the story plot, it's usually very difficult to get me enthralled in a story. I've read so much manga and so many comics that elements, characters and themes start to appear a little repetitive. I'm sure if I give it time, to establish the world and the characters backgrounds, my interest will increase. Perhaps simple dialogue isn't the best way to capture a reader, but rather something that invokes a lot of emotion and pep like CLAMP's Tsubasa who show us a heart-wrenching love scene that happens so far in advance we don't know what's going on and our questions push us forward, or like How to Train Your Dragon throws you right into the action with dragons attacking the village, and in the second movie, with a crowd roaring dragon racing scene.
I hope my critique hasn't come off as harsh, I try to be as detailed and constructive as I can. Hope this helps.
You can check out my comic: Hacheeachkee.
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-Goodluck